I saw a fat homeless man crying in the streets begging for food so to be nice for once i took the fatty to a nice indian buffet restaurant and spent all my money on giving him the best meal possible and once the homeless man was done eating he had the audacity to yell at me for more food so i smashed a dinnerplate over his head, tackled him to the floor and gave him a sucker punch directly to the stomach causing him to throw up all over the place before i grabbed him by the cloak and threw him out of the restaurant's stained glass windows and when i left the building i stomped on his head and ran away

Play my new point and click game called unyunn quest for garfield, it takes a while to load cause i accidentally made the file too fat but its worth it i promise: https://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/956605

I saw a homeless man drinking beer infront of a fancy chinese restaurant so i stole his beer bottle and smashed it into the window of the restaurant and the owner of the restaurant came outside and chased the homeless man round the streets with a broom before he corned him and bludgeon his face out with a wooden spoon whilst screaming at him multiple chinese curses

I saw a morbidly obese homeless man in the middle of the road drinking beer so as a prank i knocked him unconscious and filled up him up with candy and took him to a childrens birthday party from across the road where they hung him by a rope to the ceiling and beat him to death with a baseball bat like a pinata

Last night I was taking one of my midnight walks through my neighbourhood until I saw a homeless man screaming for money, he wasn't even asking politely just screaming (I think he was drunk) and it scared the shit out of me so my quick reflexes just pulled out my self defence pistol that I keep encase I get attacked and shot the homeless man right in the penis without thinking. The drunken mess of a homeless man then screamed really loudly like a girl which alerted some police officers who were just round the corner and they chased me down before I snapped and ran over both the police men and homeless man after I hijacked a monster truck that was coincidentally parked right in front of me.

I quickly made it back home and boarded up all my windows and doors with wooden floor boards that I painted black and as I'm typing this I'm hiding in the second floor of my basement because I've been hearing sirens outside my house for over 6 hours and even heard someone (probably the police) try to break down the door to my house.

after i dealt with the robot mouse pirates of babylon i felt the need to wipe my super solid skin with something nasty, something that reeked of pure mud. which is why i ask you (the reader) if you can spare me any mud wipes. THAMKS!!!!!11! LOL!!1

I gave a homeless man tickets to a waterpark and when he wasn't looking I strapped a gigantic bomb on his back and sent him on his way. At the water park, the homeless man jumped into a pool but as soon as the homeless man touched the water, the bomb detonated causing a massive shockwave blast destroying the entire waterpark within an instant, flinging the homeless man into the clouds and his lifeless body crash landed into the glass wall of a building. The massive shockwave blast caused a tsunami and gallons of water to break loose flooding the streets of London within an instant. over 300 hundreds civilians drowned to death with buildings and cars being consumed by the flood and policemen being eaten alive by the tsunami.

back when i was homeless i got into a fight with this morbidly obese homeless man called jackson the third. we got into a fight over the last beer and we fought about it all day until i snapped and broke a glass bottle and stabbed him in the belly with a shard of glass. i then forcefully pulled of the bloody glass shard from his fat belly and his stomach exploded all over the streets with his organs flying all over the place, me noticing this took an opportunity to get myself fed. I took each one of his organs and fried them in the middle of the words and ate them all up for my dinner and midnight snack.

for those curious heres the recipe:

First I stab the obese homeless in the stomach and his internal organs exploded into the streets, I then carefully collected each one of his organs and then put them in a bag to take home. Once I reached home I unpacked my bag of organs, turned on my stove with a frying pan on it and carefully placed each organ into the pan whilst drizzling vegetable oil on top. As it cooked I added some of my favourite seasonings which include garlic powder, black pepper, thyme and chili powder to make it taste the best it can be. After the organs were finished I then placed each one onto my plate of choice and sprinkled a few more spices which were smoked paprika, Himalayan salt and onion powder. It was extremely delicious

how i became homeless:

1. Once in class i was beaten up by three buff men who kicked me in the arse and threw me into the streets

how my parents died :

Once I was smoking 23 ciggys in my mouth all at once. At the same time my family came to visit to supply me with 46 bottles of beer and 643 packs of cigarettes. Anyway whilst I was enjoying the scent of Tobacco I mistakenly dropped all the 23 lit cigarettes in my mouth onto the floor. The fire from the cigs went onto a nuclear substance killing my parents in a fiery gas explosion

alcoholism:

And I love alcohol so much that when someone has alcohol Infront of me I bark like a dog as my stomach growls loudly hungry for more beer, I lick my lips as my throat is excited to be refreshed. I then jump stealing the bottle from the person then I nock them to the ground and claw at their body as I pull out their liver and stomach and squeeze it above my mouth for more alcohol

my brother jumped out of me once